How Does a Personal Story Affect Your Lesson?

One pastor said, “I could give the same sermon with a different personal story, and everyone will think I’ve given a completely new sermon. But if I tell the same personal story with a completely different text, everyone will think I’ve told the same sermon twice!” Funny enough, it’s the stories that stick.

Why do personal stories strike such a chord? I believe it’s because kids want to know these things can really happen. These aren’t just ancient stories. These supernatural truths don’t just apply to bearded men wearing robes. Kids want to see the principles of God’s kingdom being lived out now–in our time, in our town, by real people.

Bible lesson teachers, telling kids that Jesus wants us to forgive is fantastic (Luke 17:4). Expounding on that truth by sharing a specific story of when you forgave someone is even better. Tell them about the knots that gripped your stomach each time you heard the offender’s name before you forgave. Tell them how the Holy Spirit nudged you (or dragged you) to the point where you knew forgiveness was not just an option but a necessity. Explain to them the process by which you laid the offense at the foot of the cross, because, after all, Jesus came to bear every offense. And express the joy you felt afterward–the crushing weight that was lifted off your shoulders. By telling your personal stories, you are testifying to the truths in Scripture. This teaching model is stated clearly by Paul, “Follow my example, as I follow the example of Jesus.” (1 Corinthians 11:1)

And don’t just share the “good stuff.” Certainly we want to tell kids about the times we’ve seen God work, and the times when we were submissive putty in the Potter’s hands. But do not be afraid to tell of the times you missed the mark. Kids are incredibly forgiving of your faults, and they will learn from your mistakes. They will appreciate your honestly and be encouraged that you failed once and rose to make better choices another day.

The next time your young audience starts to fidget, engage them with a personal story. Watch what happens when you turn Biblical principles into a narrative that captures their imaginations.

What Does That Mean?

The Psalmist cried out, “Lord, give me understanding according to your word!” (Psalm 119:169)

Have you ever read a verse to kids and then realized the words were way over their heads? I still remember, several years ago at church, a 3rd grader recited Hebrews 10:7 to me verbatim. Job well done. But when I asked, “Do you know what ‘atonement’ means?” he shrugged his shoulders with a very matter-of-fact, “No.” In fact, most of the words in the NKJV translation he had committed to memory were foreign to him. He might as well have been studying another language. And the saddest part was, he had grown so accustom to this practice, he didn’t even seem to realize that the words might actually have meaning behind them.

So I began to explain each word and its definition. Now, there is nothing more fun than describing the incredible work of Jesus–especially to a child! But what I realized was, I was basically translating the translation he had memorized. I became a “middleman” of sorts. I was, on the fly, pulling words together to replace the words that were encrypted in his mind. Wouldn’t it be better for him to memorize words he already understood? I wasn’t the only one who felt this way.

Our team set out to find a translation that kids could more easily understand. We discovered the New International Reader’s Version (NIrV), which is written on a fourth grade level. Based on the NIV, but referring back to the best and oldest copies of the Hebrew and Greek, the NIrV is simple and easy to understand. Shorter words are used in place of long or complex ones, and lengthy sentences are shortened. The highly skilled translators of this Bible poured over the original texts for untold hours and used the most appropriate words they could find. When a child reads this version, he understands for himself. When he memorizes it, he gets the meaning, and it can begin to transform his heart, and therefore his actions–no “middleman” required!

Why Do We Ask So Many Questions in Small Group?

When we look at how Jesus taught in intimate settings, we see questions–hundreds of questions.

“Who do you say I am?” Matthew 16:13

“Why did you doubt?” Matthew 14:31

“What do you want me to do for you?” Matthew 20:32

“Why are you thinking such things in your heart?” Mark 2:8

Certainly, Jesus knew every answer! He wasn’t asking to gain knowledge for Himself. The point is: He wanted the pupil to ponder. He wanted the student to dig down deep to uncover what belief filled his heart.

Noting the open-endedness of Jesus’ questions, we strive to follow suit. Rarely will we ask a question like, “How many disciples where in the boat?” That is academic; our goal is application. Rather, the questions are more along the lines of: “How do you think the disciples felt when the boat started rocking?” Followed by, “Why?” And then, “When do you feel afraid?” The deeper we dig, the more good it will do. Every action is born out of a belief held (James 1:15). Without knowing what we believe, we cannot change to align with God.

In KidzLife small groups, the line of questions we give always has a direction, but in asking questions, we leave the Holy Spirit plenty of room to work. After all, it’s God who searches the heart. No matter how well-intentioned, no leader truly knows everything about a child. We can’t know who they haven’t forgiven, the fear they hide from everyone, the small bit of unbelief they may cling to. But when we ask, and the child considers, the Holy Spirit can uncover.

Some might argue that it is easier for a leader to enter small group with a bullet-pointed list of Biblical truths to disseminate. But “easy” rarely changes a life. So ask questions to get to the heart of the matter, just as Jesus did. And trust that He will bring about the change and full life that He promises (2 Corinthians 5:17, John 10:10).

Does Your Face Light Up?

“What a child really wants to know is: does your face light up when they walk in the room?” (Toni Morrison) Our volunteers often joke that everything seems to go wrong on Wednesdays. Files get mysteriously deleted at work, cars run out of gas, and kids accidentally leave a much-needed textbook at school. Stress can run high as we rush to church. But if you have the honor of working with kids, do your best to leave your stress at the door. Prayer is the very best way to do this. Seriously. If you’ve had a rough day, sit in your car for a few extra minutes and ask God to clear your mind, fill you with joy so much that it overflows, and help you to see His kids the way He does.

As a teacher of Bible Lessons for kids or a small group leader, you have been given a precious opportunity. You are Christ’s messenger. “So we are Christ’s ambassadors; God is making His appeal through us.” – 2 Corinthians 5:20a

The very next sentence begins, “We speak for Christ…” Let that sink in for a minute. For a period of time, ordained by God, you will be His mouthpiece. What will you say–and just as importantly, how will you say it? Will you be short and impatient, or will you speak with understanding as Jesus did? Will you listen intently for the answers to the questions you ask? Will kids leave your presence knowing that they matter to God?

Keep in mind that some of your kids (usually the ones who are giving you the hardest time) are dealing with very difficult situations. We live in a fallen world with broken people. Sadly, our kids are not shielded from the cares that affect us all. Let’s show them that there are Biblical solutions to the problems they face, and let’s echo the Father’s joy as He sings over each child (Zephaniah 3:17).

Transparency Leads the Way

A KidzLife Small Group leader recently told us this story:

During our small group, we were talking about times that it is hard to really believe what God says. Even though my co-leaders and I were asking great questions, none of our kids would open up. I had prayed about sharing something personal, and I felt that perhaps if I shared my own struggle, the kids might open up. So I told the kids that I had started smoking when I was a teenager. Over the years, I have tried to stop many times. But this time, as I am trying to stop smoking, I am believing God for His help and His power. Some of the kids (and the other leaders) were shocked that I admitted this problem, but I felt that it was really important for me to be honest with my struggles. It was really cool to hear the kids, one after the other, share stuff that they were dealing with too. In church, as an adult leader, it's hard to admit short-comings because we so want to be a role model to our kids, but I am learning that part of being a good leader means that I have to be honest and willing to admit areas in my life where I truly need God's help.